24 Silly Questions You May Never Have Thought To Ask

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Mahucharn, Mar 26, 2011.

  1. Mahucharn

    Mahucharn I wear a fez now, fezzes are cool. Staff Member

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    Found this, wasn't sure whether to post to Humor or General Discussion, so I chose General Discussion, move it if need be =).

    Enjoy.

    1. Ever wonder about those people who spend $2.00 a piece on those little bottles of Evian water? Try spelling Evian backwards : NAIVE

    2. Isn't making a smoking section in a restaurant like making a peeing section in a swimming pool? (My sentiments exactly!)

    3. OK ..... so if the Jacksonville Jaguars are known as the 'Jags' and the Tampa Bay Buccaneers are known as the 'Bucs,' what does that make the Tennessee Titans?

    4. If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea does that mean that one enjoys it?

    5. There are three religious truths:
    a. Jews do not recognize Jesus as the Messiah.
    b. Protestants do not recognize the Pope as the leader of the Christian faith.
    c. Baptists do not recognize each other in the liquor store or Hooters.

    6. If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't people from Holland called Holes?

    7. If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?

    8. Why do croutons come in airtight packages? Aren't they just stale bread to begin with?

    9. Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist but a person who drives a race car is not called a racist?

    10. Why isn't the number 11 pronounced onety one?

    11. If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed?

    12. If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP?

    13. Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks?

    14. What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men?

    15. I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older; then it dawned on me ... they're cramming for their final exam.

    16. I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks, so I wondered what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?

    17. Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? What are we supposed to do, write to them? Why don't they just put their pictures on the postage stamps so the mailmen can look for them while they deliver the mail?

    18. If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for?

    19. You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.

    21. Ever wonder what the speed of lightning would be if it didn't zigzag?

    22. If a cow laughed, would she spew milk out of her nose?

    23. Whatever happened to Preparations A through G?

    24. At income tax time, did you ever notice: When you put the two words 'The' and 'IRS' together it spells ... 'THEIRS'?


    Source: http://www.amazingwomenrock.com/jus...stions-you-may-have-never-thought-to-ask.html
     
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  2. Varine

    Varine And as the moon rises, we shall prepare for war

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    Most of them were meh, however I did enjoy several. However 6 made me realize something (also, Holland is just part of the Netherlands. Not the name of the country) I asked when I was younger (and subsequently got in trouble) but never actually found out. If people from Nigeria are called Nigerians, what are people from Niger called?
     
  3. FireCat

    FireCat Oh Shi.. Don't wake the tiger!

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    Oh dear. What a silly thread!

    Can you chew gum?

    How do I stop breathing but stay alive?

    Why do we need to have cars?

    Silly enough?
     
  4. Zakyath

    Zakyath Member

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    >If people from Nigeria are called Nigerians, what are people from Niger called?

    Nigeriens.

    @FireCat:

    Are you seriously saying that you don't understand a single one of the jokes?
     
  5. FireCat

    FireCat Oh Shi.. Don't wake the tiger!

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    Huh, What? Such a silly question @Zakyath
     
  6. Monsterous

    Monsterous In the Shadows, Lurking.

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    Hold it!
    I only see 23 questions there.
     
  7. tom_mai78101

    tom_mai78101 The Helper Connoisseur / Ex-MineCraft Host Staff Member

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    20. 24 questions you never thought to ask, now would you want to?

    That's what dawned me.
     
  8. Zakyath

    Zakyath Member

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    Considering your comments didn't have a trace of humour, it just didn't seem like you'd gotten it.
     
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  9. FireCat

    FireCat Oh Shi.. Don't wake the tiger!

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    But I did ;)
     
  10. The Helper

    The Helper Administrator Staff Member

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  11. The Helper

    The Helper Administrator Staff Member

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    For Great Justice!
     
  12. Accname

    Accname 2D-Graphics enthusiast

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    Most of them are not even questions and some are not very smart at all:
    No. Smoke does not come out of your body.
    If 4 out of 5 people suffer it could also be that 5 out of 5 people suffer. Its not wrong to say that 4 suffer even though all 5 do.
    Holland is not a country. Its the netherlands. And I call them Nethanderthals.
    Because its a pianist and not a playist. The guy driving a race car should be called a carist.
    Speed has nothing to do with the distance traveled.

    Stupid.
     

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