So I handed in my essay(formal writing rules apply). I'm in 11th grade and I submitted my essay who is now giving it back for us to revise. I checked and reread my essay twice for errors and made a lot of corrections. To get a really good grade, I was hoping you guys could check for grammar errors. My teacher pointed out that I have sentence fragments, use of 2nd person(even when asking a question to the reader), agreement in number agreement of pronoun & antecedent punctuation(other than commas) commas incorrect tense tense shift incorrect word/usage support for thesis faulty quoted material presented incorrectly content vague/confusing insifficient source data (despite this she liked the essay) The Age of Responsibility Driving had become an imperative, dramatic part of every modernized country, especially America. In order to minimize damage and maximize efficiency, many states have instated a wide variety of age restricting driving laws. However, many other states have lagged behind in this effort. For example, states such as Pennsylvania, North Carolina, and Florida have given licensing procedures to teenagers of fifteen years of age and full licenses to sixteen year olds. Having allowed young teens to drive, however, poses many risks and have set a terrible example for highly populated states, such as New Jersey. Teenagers are generally impulsive, immature, and rash - causing them to not always think in advance of their actions. Often, they text while driving or test their limits by speeding or other reckless actions - endangering everyone around them. Most importantly, a need to permit immature adolescents the privilege of driving no longer exists. Since using motor vehicles at the proper age is vital to ensure the safety of both the driver and all those on the road, teenagers under seventeen should not be given the full privilege of driving. Nowadays, teenagers and their cellular devices are inseparable. Texting distracts drivers from focusing on the road for a short period of time. According to the Insurance Institute for Highway Safety (September 09, 2007) "Drivers who use hand-held devices are four times as likely to get into crashes serious enough to injure themselves." The actual danger is much worse; it is impossible to keep one's eyes on a phone and the road. Essentially, one is blind. In Maryland, the U.S. Department of transportation conducted a driving test with drivers who were asked to text and drive around cones with inflated dolls as people. Normally, they passed fine, but, while texting and driving, they completely failed. Afterwards, the drivers said, "I had thought I could text and drive, but, after the results showed up, I realized just how impossible that would be." Although the results apply to experienced drivers, teenager's inexperience amplify the problem. Additionally, approximately fifty percent of teenagers driver while texting. Through increasing age requirements, teenage drivers are given more time to mature. As a result, they will understand the risks and, more likely, drive responsibly. If texting while driving is not dangerous enough, teenagers often have an unrepressed urge for adventure, which, coupled with an underdeveloped sense of danger, drastically increases the chance of an accident. Problems only amplify when a teenager is attempting to impress friends. According to the National Safety Council (NSC), researchers are finding that the area of the brain that controls the ability to weigh the consequences of one’s actions has not yet reached its maturity in a teenager – teenagers do not consider the risks of their actions. Additionally, hormones within the brain decrease control over mood changes, such as excitement. Allstate statistics of 2009 state that 55% of teens exceed the speed limit by at least ten mph, and twenty-six percent of self-identified "aggressive" teen drivers reported speeding by more than twenty mph over the limit. Since many teenagers cannot fully control themselves, state governments should help teenagers manage these hormonal changes until their brains are more fully developed. Some states, such as Maryland, have already begun to by implementing a 3 step process. It is neither restrictive - allowing teens to learn to drive before 16 (with parental supervision) - nor is it dangerous - not allowing teens to receive a full license until after 60 hours of driving, Driving Education, 2 years of experience prior to their road test. The results are staggering. Auto-accidents involving drivers under 21 has fallen by over 30% since implementing this new plan. By empowering young adults to drive, state laws actually end up giving them a task that their brains cannot yet handle - sometimes causing them to surpass their limits. However, by implementing a "level" license program, state governments are able to curtail the powerful urges of a developing mind. Now teenagers might argue that, as a young adult, they should be allowed freedom to drive and meet with friends. This, however, is not correct. First of all, teenagers are not yet adults. More importantly, according to Time magazine, three out of four car owners use their cars only once a week to meet with friends. In major cities such as New York City, Chicago, and Philadelphia, there are hundreds of buses, taxis, and subway systems - all of which are for public use. Most forms of public transportation stop at malls, theaters, and parks – common areas teenagers enjoy visiting. There is such a multitude of ways to travel both long and short distances within a city that the reason “but I need a car to get there” simply holds no water. New Jersey should not adopt a younger driving age requirement due to several reasons. Simply put, adolescents are more likely to text while driving, and, as a result of undeveloped minds, carry out reckless behavior. Furthermore, young teenagers have ample methods of transportation. If New Jersey chooses to lower the age requirement, a long chain of deaths, insurance charges, and economic failures would form and remarkably impact the state's economy and reputation. Moreover, to prevent the loss of a family member, friend, or acquaintance who may fall victim to a reckless teenager's car accident, restrictive driving ages must remain the same.