WIP Apparatus // A Novel

Discussion in 'The Writer's Corner' started by thewrongvine, Feb 18, 2013.

  1. thewrongvine

    thewrongvine The Evolved Panda Commandant Staff Member

    +505 / 1 / -0
    Hello denizens of the Writer's Corner.

    I haven't posted anything here since yes. For my creative writing class, rather than the usual assignments and prompts every week, I spoke to my teacher and am doing another option. Throughout this course, I will work on one larger project, and in this case, a novel.

    As for the actual story, I am taking a 30 page script I wrote for a film (incomplete obviously, I only finished the first act of the film so far), and turning it into a novel. I have never done something like this, as I have done writing from a novel to screenplay but not vice versa. It brings up a lot of questions, as when I write for film I think of what I would actually shoot and edit for the audio and visuals, whereas writing a story like this changes the way I have to present the scenes.

    Basically, I will need a lot of help and advice along the way. I mean a lot. I haven't written too much for a few years now so it will suck. But on to the story!

    Too tired at the moment to post info. Please hold.

    Actually I will put this up for now. This was a brief concept sample I had to write but it goes over the film's idea.

    It is the early 1800s in a land ruled by the Empire. Apparatus is an action and adventure film following the journey of three separate identities, all chasing each other. Amos Leonard, an explorer, is recruited by the government to retrieve a mysterious, stolen device but soon finds himself betrayed and on-the-run by those who hired him. At the same time, he chases after another man who has taken the device for himself.

    The main protagonist is Amos Leonard, a 36-year-old, middle-class, single man living amidst the edge of one of the large, industrialized cities under control by the Empire. In the past he served in the military as a first-rate soldier, who often went his own way on missions, returning with large sums of money. As of present day, he works as a hired guide and explorer, often pursuing his own interests.

    The Empire stands as the main, controlling government on the continent. Not much is known about the King who rules, but his lands are very much controlled by the military and his servants. One such loyalist is Benedict Bennett, captain of the army post in the city and main antagonist to Leonard. A sergeant at the time of Leonard’s enlistment, they have had brief encounters with each other. Bennett, now in his 40s, is known for his rough but sophisticated ways in dealing with people.

    The story revolves around a special device built by Hiram Walton. Near twenty years ago, a strange red meteorite fell from the sky and into the earth. Soldiers of the Empire retrieved it and recruited him, an old man at the time and scientist to research it. After some years, he constructed an invention of great importance to the Empire. Realizing the power it held, he hid the device as soldiers went to take it by force, losing his life in the process.

    Rumors of the device surface during present time, which instantly causes Benett to start up a search for the long lost item. It is revealed that sightings of the device originated from the Wayword Forest, a dangerous and uncharted no-man’s land outside the city. Realizing that his men are too inexperienced for the job, he attracts Leonard with a generous reward of riches to lead the expedition.

    Vicious animals, giant trees and bandits fill the forest around, making it easy for a man unfamiliar with the land to lose his way and life. After traveling and fighting through various obstacles, they eventually come upon the source of the rumors in a secluded cave. At last, the device is discovered, but as Leonard is about to retrieve the device, the soldiers turn on and prepare to kill him. Suddenly, a young soldier fires on his own men, shocking everyone, and in the confusion, Leonard is able to escape. The young man however quickly takes the device and runs off by himself.

    Throughout the course of the film, the three groups chase each other all for the device. The young man, whose motives for stealing the precious item are unknown to the others, runs away with seemingly no direction. Now much more intrigued in the object, Leonard makes it his own business to acquire it and pursues the young man. Simultaneously, the Empire seeks to finish Leonard off and take back the device.

    Their pursuits cause them to tear through the Empire, leaving chaos in their wake. Urgent questions arise. Who is the young man and why did he steal the device? Why does the Empire have such a large interest in it? And most importantly, what does the device actually do?
    • Like Like x 2
  2. KMilz

    KMilz You can change this now in User CP.

    +156 / 3 / -0
    Is this still a work in progress? Seems to have some potential for an epic of a pretty grand scale. Did you ever start writing, or was it just this idea you had?
  3. thewrongvine

    thewrongvine The Evolved Panda Commandant Staff Member

    +505 / 1 / -0
    Yes. I wrote some stuff. I don't remember where I saved it to be honest.

    But in my creative writing course at the end of the year, our teacher got peoples' writings to be fake "published" and printed out in books since our school had its own... those big legit printers. So I found it, there's like assorted pieces of writing in it, and one of them is Apparatus. I wrote like four chapters, nothing much. About 19 of those little-book pages.

    I think the files might be on my computer which I don't have now (college) but when I get the chance, and if I remember, perhaps I'll post it here ha.


    Though one day I do hope to turn this into a feature length film.
  4. KaerfNomekop

    KaerfNomekop Swim, fishies. Swim through the veil of steel.

    +609 / 0 / -0
    I wonder, does anyone actually use the Apparatus in the story? Or is it just a plot device until the end?
  5. Halahan

    Halahan To die will be an awfully big adventure.

    +53 / 0 / -0
    It could be an interesting movie or novel, but that is true of most ideas. It's really up to the writer. I'd have to see the prologue, or the first chapter, or some of the script I guess to elaborate or give further critique.
  6. thewrongvine

    thewrongvine The Evolved Panda Commandant Staff Member

    +505 / 1 / -0
    If I recall correctly in my head/notes (since it's not actually finished, but I still planned the whole thing out), I think they do use the apparatus in the end. Spoilers! It all "ties together" in the end or whatnot with the characters and the beginning, I tried to make it seem really cool and such when I wrote this, ha.

    I'll get back to my other computer like mid-January so I'll try to find it and post it then. The story at least, I don't know if I have the script file anymore unfortunately (though I do have hard copies of it all lol).
  7. thewrongvine

    thewrongvine The Evolved Panda Commandant Staff Member

    +505 / 1 / -0
    Found a draft on my google drive.

    Feel free to gloss over this crap.

    Attached Files:

Share This Page