General Best Comeback Line Ever

DM Cross

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Police arrested Patrick Lawrence, a 22-year-old white male, resident of Dacula, GA, in a pumpkin patch at 11:38 p.m. Friday. Lawrence will be charged with lewd and lascivious behavior, public indecency, and public intoxication at the Gwinnett County courthouse on Monday.

The suspect allegedly stated that as he was passing a pumpkin patch, he decided to stop. "You know, a pumpkin is soft and squishy inside, and there was no one around here for miles. At least Ithought there wasn't," he stated in a phone interview from the Lawrenceville jail.

Lawrence went on to state that he pulled over to the side of the road, picked out a pumpkin that he felt was appropriate to his purposes, cut a hole in it, and proceeded to satisfy his alleged "need."

"I guess I was just really into it, you know?" he commented with evident embarrassment. In the process, Lawrence apparently failed to notice the Gwinnett County police car approaching and was unaware of his audience until officer Brenda Taylor approached him.

"It was an unusual situation, that's for sure," said officer Taylor. "I walked up to (Lawrence) and he's...just working away at this pumpkin."

Taylor went on to describe what happened when she approached Lawrence. "I just went up and said, "Excuse me sir, but do you realize that you are screwing a pumpkin?"

He got real surprised, as you'd expect, and then looked me straight in the face and said, "A pumpkin? Damn...is it midnight already?"

This is pretty much the full story, but here's the rest.
 
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Sargon

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HA!

No, it's not showing up for me either. Oh well.
 

DM Cross

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It doesn't really matter if it shows up or not. It's the same article with some extra data crap on it... I think it was originally an e-mail.
 

DM Cross

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*Shrug* It's news that a guy got found screwing a pumpkin. The comeback line is added humor. :D
 

DM Cross

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Oh. Nevermind then :D Heh!
 

w/e

Boaroceraptorasaurus-Rex
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wow, and saw him while in the car, I wouln't even bother.
 

Bartuc08

Mostly known as Zomby Jezuz
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they should have pulled their little police cam out and video taped it then send it into FMV or something
 

Jimpy

The Invisible Observer
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test heart... <3

Sorta funny but strange.. for those too dumb to get the joke (like me who had my sister point it out)

In Cinderella the pumpkin and some other stuff turns into all the great magical voodoo wicka crap and turns back at midnight. So hes joking that the pumpkin was a hot chic or like a door knob or something mroe atractive.
 

Bartuc08

Mostly known as Zomby Jezuz
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Jimpy said:
test heart... <3

Sorta funny but strange.. for those too dumb to get the joke (like me who had my sister point it out)

In Cinderella the pumpkin and some other stuff turns into all the great magical voodoo wicka crap and turns back at midnight. So hes joking that the pumpkin was a hot chic or like a door knob or something mroe atractive.

lmao now i get it, hahahaha, i like only watched cinderella once, pocahantis like 20 times, but thats a idfferent story
 

DM Cross

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Sud said:
Silly Alexander!

I stated me friend sent me it, didn't I? She got it in an e-mail or something.

Alexander is NOT silly. What do I look like to you? A CLOWN?! ;)
 

Sud

"[If life=Dota] I'd have quit long ago" -- Acehart
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A court jester who likes doing his highwire act around vats of acid!
 
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