Funny Picture Thread Archive - The OG!

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Jedimindtrixxx

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Jedimindtrixxx

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Bloodcount

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Jedi those were REALLY nice!!

here is something just as epic:




After reading the Twilight series and revisiting said series in the three available movies that are currently out, I have learned many valuable lessons which I feel I should spell out plainly for any of you curious readers out there.

Relationships Advice: Twilight Style

For the dudes...

1.) Behaving in a stand-offish, curt, and morose manner is the only way to properly attract a member of the opposite sex. It doesn't matter if you clearly have emotional barriers and a severe lack of care for your fellow man - if you behave like a dick, you will get chicks!

2.) Stalking is fine, as long as you are a) conventionally attractive, and b) 'can't help yourself.' This goes double for breaking and entering!

3.) Keeping secrets from your partner is fine, even if keeping those secrets threatens the life of said partner.

4.) Leaving your co-dependent, mentally unstable, and possibly socially retarded partner in a sudden and cruel manner is perfectly fine as long as you're doing it to 'protect' them.

5.) Forcing yourself on a girl without pause will only make them admit they have feelings for you. Sexually assaulting them is fine, as long as you apologize (even half-heartedly) afterward.

6.) If the object of your affection rejects you after the hundredth attempt, then you should set your sights on their child. Because if you can't get at the mom, the daughter is the next best thing!

7.) Acting like an aggressive and controlling dick will only arouse your lady further.

8.) Physically harming your lady so much that she winds up in the hospital is fine. She can always just come up with an excuse, like 'she fell down the stairs', since she's such a clumsy idiot.

9.) Coercing your lady to marry you in exchange for allowing her to live the lifestyle she truly wants to lead is okay because it's old-fashioned and romantic that way.

10.) If you ask fifty times and she says no, she might just say yes on number fifty-one!



For the ladies...

1.) If a guy tells you that he's a threat to your life and must leave you be lest he seriously harm and/or kill you, then he must be the love of your life! You must pursue him with even greater fervor.

2.) It's okay if your potential love interest is stupid, temperamental, violent, and possessive as long as he's 'hot.'

3.) It's romantic to put yourself in life-threatening situations so you can hear the voice of your boyfriend again, especially if your boyfriend's voice is yelling at you constantly to stop being a stupid bint.

4.) When your partner leaves you, it's perfectly normal to go into shock, stop eating, stop talking to friends, and have night terrors that make you scream in pain in the middle of the night and wake your poor over-worked dad.

5.) Boys who leave you will always return because they must be the one!

6.) Because it's obvious that your boy will return to you, you must wait up for them for as long as it takes - even if it's months on end.

7.) If another male romantic alternative presents himself to you, you should allow him to pursue you romantically even if you know you have no intention of returning his feelings. In fact, using him to fix things for you, buy things, and chase off other male alternatives is a good idea.

8.) Men can change themselves for you as long as you sacrifice yourself to change them.

9.) If you have mental and emotional problems, you shouldn't try to change yourself for the better. Instead, you should hold out for someone who has similar issues so you don't have to make an attempt to improve yourself.

10.) Begging for sex is acceptable in any normal relationship.
 

Varine

And as the moon rises, we shall prepare for war
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Puberty really hit him like a ton of bricks....
 
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  • jonas jonas:
    It would suck to spend 400$ on a system that doesn't have the capability you need
  • jonas jonas:
    and it will probably take a couple of tries to get the settings right
  • Varine Varine:
    It would but I can also just make sure I can return them. The system I have works, it's pretty straightforward and I tested it with a camera I have. All it really is is a little cartridge that holds the transparency film and a white light source behind it that projects the image into the lens
  • Varine Varine:
    I'll have to fuck with the light a bit and try some different lighting methods to get color accuracy, but I have IT8 targets for that
    +1
  • The Helper The Helper:
    get that color accuracy :)
  • Varine Varine:
    They're really helpful for calibrating things because I'm really colorblind, so I'm not great at doing it by eye
    +2
  • Varine Varine:
    Well the long, slow slog of winter has officially begun here
  • Varine Varine:
    I have a bunch of community service I have to do, and I have a feeling there will be a lot of snow shoveling involved now
  • The Helper The Helper:
    don't know why people choose to live in that kind of weather :)
  • Varine Varine:
    Well
  • Varine Varine:
    My job is here
  • Varine Varine:
    I was born here man I didn't choose shit
  • Varine Varine:
    And also, I keep moving away and it doesn't get any better. I moved to San Antonio and shit froze there AND we had blackouts
  • tom_mai78101 tom_mai78101:
    I'm back, suffering from severe jet lag.
  • The Helper The Helper:
    Cold is following your ass around Varine - I just dont think I could handle a snowy winter.
  • The Helper The Helper:
    Welcome Back Tom!
  • The Helper The Helper:
    I hear that taking a Melatonin around your normal bedtime can really fix jet lag
  • tom_mai78101 tom_mai78101:
    Yeah, I also heard about that as well. I think I'm good. I'm just lucky it's the weekend so I have some time to readjust.
    +1
  • Varine Varine:
    It was a fucking blizzard today, shoveling was an effort in futility.
  • Varine Varine:
    Melatonin gives me nightmares
  • Varine Varine:
    They had me shoveling out the parking lot for the jail. Fucking pointless, they need a blow.
  • Varine Varine:
    Well they gave me a snow blower but it was too wet to do much with with other than compact everything. Oh well, the cop cars can get into there now when they arrest people I guess
    +1

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