Funny Real-life Story Thread

[SilverHawk]

I thought I would start this to give everyone a bit to laugh about. Here's my first contribution:

A few months ago, my friend took his test for his permit. A few weeks before that, however, his mom let him drive her SUV so he could get the feel of driving. However, he didn't know the gas pedal from the brake pedal, and crashed it into a tree (minimal damage though).

LOL!!!

 

[XXXconanXXX]

One of my cats, a really scaredy came into the living room one time, and was really afraid of something. My dog started chasing her, and she ran into the kitchen. The kitchen floor is tile, and very slippery for cats. My dog stopped for a second, and the cat kept running, but wouldn't go anywhere. She was sitting there, but due to the floor's slipperyness, she couldn't go anywhere. She started getting momentum, and ran into the wall becuase she couldn't stop herself. She was ok, but it was freakin hilarious.

 

[ThE-eNiGmA]

Lol, I like to give my English Springer Spaniel a run through the kitchen. If I have shoes on (i don't like shoes much) I can actually run faster...and he starts whining as he runs after me, then doesnt slow down...smashing into the front door. The only reason I can stay ahead....is the slippery kitchen floor.

 

[SilverHawk]

I have a funny video about cats somewhere; maybe I'll post it in the appropriate thread if I can find it.

 

[MoonRazer]

About 6 months ago, i was working with a ground up version of a these really spicy peppers(which i grow myself ) and you MUST NOT touch your eye or you could end up going to the hospital with permanet eye damage. well, i , knowing this, was very careful, so after about an hour of grinding it up and Not touching my eye, i went over to the kitchen sink and was about to wash the peppers off my hands, when all of a sudden i sneeze...........i dont know about u guys but i tend to, when i sneeze, put my hands in a almost praying form so that inadvertatly my index and middle finger touch each of my eyes.....do i need to go on from there?

oh and i was fine i just ran my eyes under the faucet for a few minutes

 

[MasterOfABCs]

Well i figured it would be a good idea to take multiple chemicals and mix them all together. Then realizing that they were unexplosive, applied them to myself.

I've come up with a biological weapon known as - Severe skin dryness.

My skin was so dry, when i yawned my skin ripped.

And for you slow ones; this was not cool.

 

[w/e]

I have a funny video about cats somewhere; maybe I'll post it in the appropriate thread if I can find it.

I ahve to god one.

.....

What I meant to say was I have the dog one.

 

[MoonRazer]

Well i figured it would be a good idea to take multiple chemicals and mix them all together. Then realizing that they were unexplosive, applied them to myself.

I've come up with a biological weapon known as - Severe skin dryness.

My skin was so dry, when i yawned my skin ripped.

And for you slow ones; this was not cool.

dude u have got to tell me what that is. i will put it in my sister moisturizer.

 

[MasterOfABCs]

A combo of:

Coast
Dove
Rubbing Alcohol (lots of this)
Velocity TM
Hand soap
Hot water
Old Spice body wash
Sauve coconut shampoo



Well today I almost brunt my hair off... I love my hair.

After watching a few videos of "The Works bomb" I wanted to try it myself.

Did it once, it was okay.

Then I googled it and got some more info on how to make it more "fun"

placed lite candels around it.

put the "bomb" in there.

Nothing happened for a while so I whent to check it out.

Ka-boom fire. nearly roasted myself there.

It was all good until I saw both prents behind me...

They were umm, not, not in the spirit.

 

[MoonRazer]

lol. i can belive it

 

[zylack]

Heres an illistration. It was freaking hilariuos...the look on his face...then he had to go check cuase he thought he popped a nut. He balanced with the stick in his crotch for some time and was off the ground at least by 2 inches

poor guy...happened a while ago...we were sword firghting with palm tree limbs and i think he was tyring to do a move from tekken or something...dont ask

(just touched peppers, sneezes and puts)....hands in a almost praying form so that inadvertatly my index and middle finger touch each of my eyes.....do i need to go on from there?

a few months back i went to my grandparents house..they grow peppers there and i did the same thing

 

[MoonRazer]

a few months back i went to my grandparents house..they grow peppers there and i did the same thing

hurts a bit doesn't it?

 

[NiKaNoRoU_GR]

This incident happened when I was with some friends in a camp.We agreed to do this: when a small guy tried to walk past us, we would "shit" him by bugging him with this:
Me: Hey, you there...
Small guy (11 year old): Yes?
Me&my friends: Go fuckyourself ..l.. !!!!
Small guy leaving frustrated, we loling...
Once, then, one (small guy) got past us and then:
Me: Hey, you there...
(Small) guy: You talking to me?
Me&my friends: You stink! go ...yourself ..l.. !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(Small) guy (taking the hood he wore off: Hahaha!!! thought I was a small one, eh?
Then it turned out that this "dwarf" was the camp's owner (about as tall as a 12 year-old guy) who was dressed like a small guy, just to find out the ones making fun of kids...he instantly kicked us off the camp...
Well, that's it, actually...

EDIT: 666 post, (let me double-post, let me double-post!!!!!)

 

[Siefer]

Was at a greek restaurant with my family. While ordering, here was the conversation. Incidently we're all at the cashier at the same time.

Clerk: Want something to drink?
My dad: I'll take root beer.
Clerk: We don't have that
Dad: Just a Coke, then.
Clerk: Pepsi?
Dad: Ok then, Dr. Pepper
Clerk: Mr. Pibb, okay?
Dad: .........how about, Sprite?
Clerk: Seven-up?
Dad: I'll just take Bottled Water.
Clerk: Want a water cup?
Dad: ......You know, what, never mind.

We get our drink, go to our table and sit down. Immediately my mom saw my dad without a drink and asked, "You should go over and get a drink."
We all looked at her

 

[seph ir oth]

*working at Customer Service at Target*

Customer: Hi! I'd like to return the item please for store credit! *hands me a box displaying a camcorder on its sides*
Me: OK, let me just check the merchandise. *opens it up, nothing but plastic bagging is in it*
Customer: *runs away*

I was very confused during the rest of the day.

 

[King TonGoll]

lol, you worked at target? well picture this. some one comes in with a box for a bom box. he said, well you see it has this really loud whine too it. then you open it up and its a crying baby, the guy runs of yelling "its yours now sucker!".

wouldnt that be funny?