Saving Heaven

S

Stinman

Guest
This is story that I decided to make because I am very interested in Greek mythology and I really enjoy writing and reading adventure stories. I'm still working on it but please give me your honest opinion on it.

Saving Heaven
Millions of years ago there was a man named Arthias which possessed a great horn designed with many gold and porcelain metalics. Arthias was the king of a well known city called the Machi. Arthias knew what powers this horn contained, and he planned to lock it away deep in the sands of ancient Egypt, to where the dangers of it would never be unlocked again. But, before he could do that, he used this horn to spawn the gods from the heavens and clashed against the evil dark side of the underworld and locked the demons away for all eternity. At last he had saved the heavens from and evil fate and he buried the horn in the sands to where it would never be seen or used again. Little did he know, a young boy named Ceratin would find this horn and have an experience that he will never forget.

"Isn't it beautiful." Ceratin said taking a long breath of air afterword.
"Yah yah whatever." His crude brother Iaasic said to him as they ran across the deep, soft sands toward the great ancient pyramids.
"I wonder how long it took the ancent Egyptians to make all of this stuff?" said Ceratin quickly glancing at all the magnificent structures.
"I don't know, probably a few months, years..." said Iaasic.
"We'll go take a peak inside them tommorow, but first let's go set up our beds and get some shuteye" said Iaasic carelessly as he walked back to the wagon.
That night, Ceratin's mind was running wild of all the things that he had heard about the pyramids and what was inside them. But, eventually, he fell asleep from exshaustion. Ceratin knew that Iaasic could care less about whether they got up tommorow morning and explored the mysterious pyramids themselves or not. That was the one thing that angred him the most about his brother. He was so uncaring and boring to be around because he didn't have the erge to do anything.
Finally, the red hot sun had risen up from behind great rectangular pyramids and Ceratin was jumping around the hotel room wildly. He was so excited until his brother Iaasic threw a pillow at his head and knocked him down hitting the floor head first. As soon as they got ready to go and drove to the magnificent pyramids, Ceratin was so excited, once again, that he could barely contain himself from shouting with joy.
 

King TonGoll

ORLY?*DDR*
i love greek mytholigy. have you read

"Myths and Tragedies of Ancient Greece"?

maybe if you read this book, and made a refrence too

"25 centuries of sea warfare" you could pick out battle seens and such using real facts.
 
S

Stinman

Guest
Maybe

I haven't read that but i have read a few other greek mythology books, and i got a few ideas from those. I might check into that book though.
 

Halahan

To die will be an awfully big adventure.
It's pretty good, I suggest typing it on word first so you can use spell check, because "egsoschin" is spelled exhaustion. and "Wut" is spelled What. Try to add a bit more detail, possibly the heat or the sand, or how the sun burned right down to your throat. Otherwise, good.
 
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