The NRM gate has finally opened - Book 1 out of 10.

Master

Thou shall be helped by...The Black Adder!
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72
NRM Book 1: A World in Peril

One age before time and place, there was a Realm with incredible beauty, waiting for someone to discover it.
Until one day five people from another world discovered an entrance to it. They were from a
world full of cruelty and evil, and they sought peace. They took all they people in the Realm and sealed the entrance not to let evil pass.
Then they lived in peace for thousands of years, with the 5 of them rule over the countries. They had descendants who ruled one after another.
Today, the 50th descendants face a vital problem; Evil eventually found a way to pass through, and started to corrupt the Realm.
Another problem is, that the Ruler of the Dark Village, is unaware that he is infected by a virus that will eventually consume himself unless he succumbs to evil.
Now, all five Emperors rise together and march for the NRM Elder, the only person who existed in the Realm before they came. They seek advice on the matter.

END prologue.



Starring:

Blake, the Thunder Kingdom Emperor <Rinpun>

Teka, the Fire Kingdom Emperor <phyrex1an>

Droon, the Aqua Kingdom Emperor <Acehart>

Saito, the Light Kingdom Emperor <The Helper>

Gekko, the Dark Kingdom Emperor <Seth Cross>




If you want to participate, PM me so that we can arrange things.

~Chapter 1 Episode 1 Part 1 coming soon (Page 1-3 of 455).

EDIT: for those that might belittle it, just wait until the rest comes up ;)
 

Jindo

Self
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460
Hmm, very interesting, look forward to seeing it finished :).

Since I don't really have much else to say, are you gonna publish it!? :D
 

Master

Thou shall be helped by...The Black Adder!
Reaction score
72
Since I don't really have much else to say, are you gonna publish it!? :D

Yes. I legally need to be 18, so I have to wait. But I can patent it, so it assured that no one would steal it.
 

LordOglog

New Member
Reaction score
16
Looks very good Master I shall look forward to the next bits. One thing though
Once upon a time there was a
is so overused and you should definatley change that IMO.
 

Master

Thou shall be helped by...The Black Adder!
Reaction score
72
Nah...changed both in the book and here.
 

Master

Thou shall be helped by...The Black Adder!
Reaction score
72
and here it is:

-=NRM BOOK 1 Chapter 1 Episode 1=-
the Crimson Pearl
Part 1​




Dialogues:
B: Blake
T: teacher
A: Ambassador
G: Guard
S: Stranger

The wind was calmly blowing to many directions, and a sweet scent was intriguing the citizens of the Thunder Kingdom. Blake was doing combat training with his teacher.
T: -To learn how to fight, you must first learn how to make peace, young Master.
B: -I know. I just can’t hold it that the Eastern bandits raid once again the nearby. They should be peaceful after the generous treaty we gave them.
T: -Indeed, but there seems that evil lurks even within good. The one cannot exist while the other does not. You should be always aware, Master.
(Blake unites hands)
B: -I know! ~Thundershock!~
A zap flashes out of his hands, and jolts the Training post, putting it on fire.
T: -You do not need to rage, Master. The power of lightning was given to you to be used for emergencies only.
B: -You know what? I had enough for today. See you tomorrow, old man.
T: -As your Majesty wish.
The teacher leaves. Blake is left alone, staring at the training post with a nervous instinct. Then he unites his hands again and roams with rage:
~Thundershock! ~
The post is completely destroyed. Blake now exhales loudly, and leaves the training ground. A guard is waiting him at the entrance.
G: -Your Majesty…
B: -Yes, yes. What is it now?
G:-An ambassador from the Aqua Kingdom requests an audience. What should I tell him?
B: -Tell him to wait me at the entrance hall in some minutes.
G: -As your Majesty wish.
Blake walks up the stairs to his room with boredom.
[Another day passes out like this] [I should really care more about my people than letting those formal peacocks treat them like that].
Blake sighs. He wars out his formal clothes, and takes out a silver-scolded crown on his head. [(I feel so ridiculous, that they make me different from common folk, just because I had as father a descendant from the Founders)=Blake].
Blake took off the crown. He wears his normal clothes again.
B: -If it is so, then let people accept me right on how I am!

Blake went downstairs and met the ambassador. He was wearing a blue suit with silk paints and a gold cape.
A: -Greetings, Your Highness. I am Ustar, ambassador and financial adviser of his Majesty Emperor Droon of Aqua. I have come to inform you that my Master would like you to immediately be sent to his Palace. He wishes to talk to you in private.
I am also here to inform you that my Master has commanded me to tell you this: Anaru Sepkra.
B: -Ugh!
Blake coughed. He was looking as if he was going to die, his body was shaking and he had a pale color in his skin.
B: -This…
[(Could it be…the day…has come???)=Blake]
Suddenly, a man rushed into the Palace Entrance, and stabbed Blake.
[What the…] GAH! (Blood comes out of mouth)
A: -Your Majesty!
Some nearby guards run forward. The ambassador trembled.
A: -Seize this fool!
The soldiers tried to, but one after the other fell before that man’s blade. Each cut that blade was creating was even deeper.
S: -The day has come, Blake.
The man smiled with an evil face and stared Blake as he was trying to get up. He was hit next to the heart, and it hurt so much that he could barely get up. The ambassador ran away to call for reinforcements. But he forgot that Blake could be at this man’s mercy. Blake finally stood up, and threw out some more blood.
B: -Who are you? Ugh…
The stranger smiled once again, and cleaned his blade out of blood on a dead soldier’s skin.
S: -I am the last thing you will ever see, EX-Thunder Emperor!
The stranger stood up, rose his blade, and started running towards Blake. He was holding a Black Pearl on his right hand.
[(That Pearl…is it a stone from the Dark Kingdom?)=Blake]
B: -I don’t know who you are, but I surely have to…GREET YOU!
~Thundershock!~
S: -Huh? WHAT?
(Thundershock hit the enemy in the chest)
S:-Aaarrgh!!!
B: -Hah. A wound could weaken me, but I could never get defeated so easily!
S: -You…who are you?
B: -I am not called Emperor of Thunder for being so weak.
~Thundershock!~
S: -Aaaargh!!! (coughs out blood and grips in half)
B: -Live to fight another day. You will now be transferred to the dungeons.
By that time, the Ambassador had return with other guards.
A: -A…are you okay, your Highness?
B: -I’m fine. Take him away.
A: -Okay. Three take him away.
G: -Yes Sir.
S: -Cough cough...we shall meet again...but then you won't be saved from Anaru Sepkra...
B: -I suppose so...

END~

Part 2 coming soon.
 

Jindo

Self
Reaction score
460
Nice start :).

And do you really have to be 18 to publish it!? I've seen a couple of young kids who've had their stories published :eek:.
 

Master

Thou shall be helped by...The Black Adder!
Reaction score
72
Yes, but in my country, no :p
but as I said before, there is an official patent for it, so any author of any copy shall be punished by the law ;)
 

DM Cross

You want to see a magic trick?
Reaction score
566
That is not the way you do dialogue. That's script-style dialogue, not what you use for a novel.
 

Master

Thou shall be helped by...The Black Adder!
Reaction score
72
I agree, dear admin, but this is the style I use for now :(
I am doing fixes and adding some new characters...only that you only commented on the dialogue :p
 

Halahan

To die will be an awfully big adventure.
Reaction score
52
This is a play...
Still good though... describe more, or else its hard to understand whats happening nearly as well.
And can I be a character :eek:
lol. I'll be the guy that lives in a hole but has some ownage magical prowes ;)
 

Master

Thou shall be helped by...The Black Adder!
Reaction score
72
for that, I'm afraid you have to PM me or talk to me on MSN :p
Sorry, but next update is out tommorow. Keep the feedback.
 
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