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“He was the first person who was enthusiastic about my job in a non-fetishistic way.”
Contrary to anti-porn crusaders’ claims, most experienced adult performers say they don’t struggle with systemic on-set abuse, sexual burn-out, or other supposedly common porn world woes. Instead, they point to widespread stigmatization, objectification, and misunderstandings around their jobs from those outside the industry as the biggest headaches of working in porn. These issues can affect every facet of their lives—including their dating and sex lives.
Civilians, an industry term for porn outsiders, often treat porn like a documentary film rather than a sexual fantasy. So they assume porn stars are always turned on and that if they hook up with or date one, they’ll be perpetually down for any of the wild sex acts they’ve seen on a screen. Even those who don’t outright objectify performers may still feel intimidated by their apparent experience, or self-conscious about getting involved with someone in a stigmatized industry, and allow those feelings to color sexual encounters. Most civilians also struggle with jealousy when they think about their industry partners having sex with other people at work—feelings often exacerbated by the odd hours, frequent travel, and physical intensity of the job, which can strain the time or energy many performers have to be sexually intimate with partners off-set. These issues are so common and tricky that some performers will only date other industry insiders, or take long breaks from off-set relationships altogether.
In reality, while porn stars often have more sexual experience and knowledge than the average person, most of their intimate lives look more like anybody else’s than civilians might expect. Over the last decade, prominent performers such as Buck Angel, Jiz Lee, and Stoya have spoken openly about their actual preferences and their experiences with the challenges of dating civilians weighed down by stigmas and assumptions. They’ve shared details about managing issues like setting boundaries between their on- and off-screen intimate lives, addressing partner jealousy, and managing common civilian misunderstandings.
Yet there are surprisingly few public accounts of how adult performers and their civilian partners navigate the nitty-gritty specifics of off-screen sex. (Several performers suggested to VICE that they avoid sharing intense details of this part of their personal lives because they don’t want to puncture the sexual brands or fantasies they or their fans have built around their porn personas.)
www.vice.com
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This a great article and well worth the read!
Contrary to anti-porn crusaders’ claims, most experienced adult performers say they don’t struggle with systemic on-set abuse, sexual burn-out, or other supposedly common porn world woes. Instead, they point to widespread stigmatization, objectification, and misunderstandings around their jobs from those outside the industry as the biggest headaches of working in porn. These issues can affect every facet of their lives—including their dating and sex lives.
Civilians, an industry term for porn outsiders, often treat porn like a documentary film rather than a sexual fantasy. So they assume porn stars are always turned on and that if they hook up with or date one, they’ll be perpetually down for any of the wild sex acts they’ve seen on a screen. Even those who don’t outright objectify performers may still feel intimidated by their apparent experience, or self-conscious about getting involved with someone in a stigmatized industry, and allow those feelings to color sexual encounters. Most civilians also struggle with jealousy when they think about their industry partners having sex with other people at work—feelings often exacerbated by the odd hours, frequent travel, and physical intensity of the job, which can strain the time or energy many performers have to be sexually intimate with partners off-set. These issues are so common and tricky that some performers will only date other industry insiders, or take long breaks from off-set relationships altogether.
In reality, while porn stars often have more sexual experience and knowledge than the average person, most of their intimate lives look more like anybody else’s than civilians might expect. Over the last decade, prominent performers such as Buck Angel, Jiz Lee, and Stoya have spoken openly about their actual preferences and their experiences with the challenges of dating civilians weighed down by stigmas and assumptions. They’ve shared details about managing issues like setting boundaries between their on- and off-screen intimate lives, addressing partner jealousy, and managing common civilian misunderstandings.
Yet there are surprisingly few public accounts of how adult performers and their civilian partners navigate the nitty-gritty specifics of off-screen sex. (Several performers suggested to VICE that they avoid sharing intense details of this part of their personal lives because they don’t want to puncture the sexual brands or fantasies they or their fans have built around their porn personas.)
How a Porn Star Navigates Sex with Her ‘Civilian’ Boyfriend
“He was the first person who was enthusiastic about my job in a non-fetishistic way.”
www.vice.com
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This a great article and well worth the read!
