General Porcupine takes revenge on tourists breaking sex law

[The Helper]

The law in the US state of Florida specifically forbids having sex with a porcupine, and for a good reason, as two tourists from Russia discovered while trying to break it.

The Sunshine State is rather restrictive on what you can do between the sheets. No doing it if you are not married; no kissing your wife’s breast; no oral sex; no indulging in Kama Sutra; and absolutely NO SEX WITH PORCUPINES!

However two tourists from St Petersburg, Russia, decided to defy the wise instruction of Florida’s legal system and engage in lewd activity with the spiked beast, reports Tvoy Den tabloid.

Porcupine takes revenge on tourists breaking sex law

The law in the US state of Florida specifically forbids having sex with a porcupine, and for a good reason, as two tourists from Russia discovered while trying to break it.

www.rt.com

 

[Vicboy]

WHY do I suddenly hear so much animal rape lately?

First a squirrel

Then this???

What the

 

[Prometheus]

My retard state...

 

[Jindo]

My retard state...

It was Russian Tourists.

 

[Ninva]

What's with the sex laws? Men of Florida can't kiss their wife's breast? That's a little strange... I can understand no oral (or at least try), but the breast law leaves me stumped. KC, your people are strange.

Also, didn't the USA forbid sexual intercourse with animals? And why would you want to fuck a porcupine?

I'm just chalk full of good questions.

 

[Vicboy]

In Soviet Russia, you screw the porcupine.

In America, the porcupine screws you!

 

[Miz]

My retard state...

Reading the title I thought it was going to be Florida.
I <3 La Florida and its randomness

 

[Prometheus]

It was Russian Tourists.

Florida Laws.

 

[xxxtrickyxxx]

lol doesnt surprise me someone tried it but, i hope part about no oral sex etc was a joke since a law cant forbid you from performing certain sexual actions with your partner married or not in your home. hell you can have sex with your kitchen floor (however that works) if you want, as long as it aint in public or harming anything like... animals?

on second thought, i imagine that would have been pretty painful... i had a porcupine once in my garage (i live in central usa, guess it got lost 600 miles in the wrong direction somehow lol) and that thing was a beast. now if a opposum wandered in at the same time, that would have been an awesome fight.

Porcupine vs Opposum

who would win?

 

[Prometheus]

Anything with pine will win.

 

[Ashcroft]

Surprising to know that man will still do it to an animal, especially a Porcupine.

~Ash

 

[WastedSavior]

Anything with pine will win.

Pineapple vs Food Processor

 

[sjakie]

Theres no need for a law here. I think everyone trying to screw a porcupine will teach himself not to do that again

 

[Prometheus]

Pineapple vs Food Processor

Pineapple will win.

 

[Pineapple]

Anything with pine will win.

Truth.

 

[gameman]

Anything with pine will win.

pork - q - pine: Pork, comes from a FAT animal; Q is a letter; Pine is a type of tree, commonly mistaken for a fruit or a moderator at the helper.net.

so yes anything that grows scented christmas decorations will win.

Pineapple will win.

so are you talking about the fruit or the moderator?

 

[Genkora]

They did it for lulz. Although I wasn't aware Florida had so many sex laws. Somehow I doubt they are followed.

 

[Bloodcount]

Lol, no BDSM?! I am never, ever going to Florida...
Just for the record, I am Kidding.

 

[The Helper]

Fucking a porcupine consequences FTW!