Formal Build a Story Thread: Fantasy

Discussion in 'The Writer's Corner' started by Ninva, Mar 20, 2012.

  1. Ninva

    Ninva Retired

    STOP!
    This is a fantasy story-line. The first person to post here should keep that in mind. If there is interest in particular genres, please send me a note, and we'll begin the work of starting one of these threads for you. This thread, however, is strictly fantasy.

    What does the fantasy genre entail?

    1. Imaginary world
    2. Characters that do not relate to the real world
    3. Space travel, magic, gods, philosophical intrigue, etc. is accepted (bleeding into the realm of sci fiction and different realms of fiction is acceptable as long as reference towards pop culture isn't made and a general acknowledgement of our world -- unless the story calls for it)
    4. Many galaxies can be accessed here

    Rules below still apply. Follow them to keep alive the story and to drive the plot.

    Expounding on rules:

    4. DO NOT post more than one or two paragraphs. Complete or introduce your idea in the limit of one or two paragraphs. This rule should encourage the participants to work together. It is a group project, so before you post, make sure you understand what plot devices are being used, which haven't been completed, and aim to complete them.

    5. This isn't your story. Everything isn't up for grabs. This isn't a role playing game. The focus is on the story, not your particular character. Play with words, introduce interesting characters that'll last, and add all the suspense possible. Don't worry, you'll get your chance to throw in plot twists and other fun things when appropriate.

    6. Read this!

    7. If a plot device has been completely ignored or killed off, you must go without it. Keep the transitions smooth. Try not to introduce a character too soon when the driving plot action hasn't lulled.

    (This rules tend to change throughout the life of this story.)
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  2. Sajin

    Sajin User title under construction.

    I'm no writer and all but I guess I'll start...

    An ominous wind blew through the narrow passage way as a shadowy figure stepped forward. "Why does this always happen to me?" he whispered under is breath, "They always run off with out me." He looked around, hoping to catch a glimpse of where his friends ran off to with no avail, the entire cavern they had ventured into was pitch black. He sighed and pressed his back against the cold stone wall, "These guys will be the death of me," he clenched his hands tight together and blew into them. His hands suddenly became illuminated, glowing powerfully in blue light. This in turn, light up the once black passage walls. With his new found heading, he held his hand forward and continued deeper into the cavern.
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  3. esb

    esb Because none of us are as cruel as all of us.

    The cavern seemed to have no end, and as he walked and he looked back, no beginning either. There wasn't so much he could see, I mean, it was just rocks; The inside looked like a regular cavern. However the sound was eerie. That lack of sound. He could hear a pitch of pure silence. He continued with a hasty pace, hoping to catch up and hoping he didn't come up to a fork else he'd get lost.

    The high pitch in his ears died soon died, for he could he something again. He wasn't sure what, and he ran deeper into the cavern. Ran away from the darkness now behind him. The sounds were of whispers. Even as he was running full speed they never got louder, but he could hear whispers. The whispers weren't exactly words, or at least he couldn't figure out what they were saying or where they were coming from- or if they were whispers at all.
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  4. Sajin

    Sajin User title under construction.

    He continued to follow the whispers, now sprinting at full speed. "Kain!" the words echoed through the cave. He stopped and looked around, the voice was familiar. Down the cave in the distance he saw two figures running towards him. "Jax! Abel! Is that you?" he called out, but no response came. As the figures got closer he could tell that it was in fact his two friends who not long ago, ran off without him into the depths of the cave, but they weren't alone. A enormous black figure was chasing them, and was close on their tail. Kain knew he had to do something, he drew a small knife and pressed it to his arm. A small stream of blood started to flow from the self inflected wound, dropping to the ground and closed his eyes. Moments later the fresh blood started to boil, and a block cloud engulfed Kain and his immediate surroundings, transforming him into a slim figure, pulsating with dark magic.

    He looked at his approaching friends, and with almost unimaginable speed he jumped towards the beast which was chasing them. In the blink of an eye Kain was there, right in the face of the beast which he had stopped with one hand.





    (Fight of flight, you choose ;) )
  5. Fatmankev

    Fatmankev Chef, Writer, and Midnight Toker

    (This was written pre-third post) Just wanted to point out that this is meant to be a well-thought out, dutifully crafted story by a multitude of writers, and it seems already to be headed towards and action scene. Perhaps it would be wise to try to steer the story in the direction of character and world development for the time being, before we proceed with and obstacle of some sort. Don't want to make the same mistake as last time, now.

    (Btw, gettin' the feeling that the main character is a bit of a pussy. Not a problem, and could add a comic element to the whole thing. Just thought it would be worth pointing out.)

    Fuck me, someone beat me to the chase. Well, here's how I would've spun it. No time for a new passage, so I guess I won't be contributing today. Maybe tomorrow.

    He breathed in harsh, ragged gasps, his slapping footfalls echoing up from the weathered stone floors as he rushed recklessly onward. The whispers had taken on a distinctly chant-like tone and he could almost hear the words, almost understand them; the halls suddenly grew dim, and he refocused his concentration on containing the light within his palm. He could feel the hairs at the nape of his neck standing on end, the cold sweat tickling down the small of his back, his quaking legs ready to give underway. He didn't know what could be lurking down within the depths of the caverns, but he didn't intend to be there when it came out.

    Desperate to escape the sounds of the chanting, he rushed onward, snaking down the right side whenever he came to an intersection; it was how Janelle had once instructed him to deal with caves. If he always followed the right wall, he'd be able to reach the exit eventually, and he could meet up with them in Costa Negro. He shuddered and faltered a step, looking back over his shoulder. Had the chanting grown louder? His lume flickered suddenly and then sputtered out as a wind to flame. Panic swelled into terror as it began to seem as if he were being shouted down at from all sides in an unfamiliar tongue, the deep, booming chanting filling his heart with dread. He ran for all he was worth into the overwhelming darkness, whether he was headed straight or some other direction he couldn't be sure. With his heart pounding in his chest, blood hammering at his temples and adrenaline coursing through his veins, he tripped. His world seemed to be pulled out from under him as he came crashing down, unable to even hold his arms out in warding. Stone cracked hard into his chin and for a moment the darkness and the chanting were erased by a brilliant white light. He laid there in a daze as he waited for his brain to work, and it began to function as the darkness all be returned, a faint, reddish glow hovering over him the only thing breaking it. It was quiet, suddenly. "Where in the blazes did you run off to?" It was a familiar voice, in a time he needed it most. He slowly peered up at his friends with a shaky smile.
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  6. esb

    esb Because none of us are as cruel as all of us.

    The beast simply looked at him. Kain was ready to fight and defend his friends. The beast took the first swing and just as its fist was about to make contact with Kain's face, his friends pulled him back. "Are you an idiot?! That thing will kill you. Use your blood sacrifice to illuminate the cave for us to see." And unwillingly, he withdrew the black cloud of energy and instead light shone through his hands. It was bright as daylight, the cave perfectly illuminated as far as the eye could see; however the light wasn't blinding. Jax and Abel were now confronting the beast, and the beast was swinging left and right. It barely fit in that cavern.

    Jax rolled from one side of the cave to the other as the beast smashed the floor with both hands. Abel ran toward one side of the wall, jumped off it and kicked the beast square in the face. Jax took out his entrapment whip and swiftly trapped the beast's hands in a single move. Abel swiftly slid under the beast and used her entrapment whip to tie the best from its feet. The beast struggled to free but only managed to fall face first. "Lets get out of here, enough fun and games. Kain, light the way back out." said Jax as they dragged the beast back to where they came from. "Lesson number who knows what, never break focus when tying something. Your energy keeps it bound, not the whip's strength." Abel told Kain. "How much do you think they'll give us for this troll?" asked Kain as he shone the way out.

    I agree it was a bit too early for a fighting scene. I attempted to establish the characters a bit and the situation.
  7. Danny Cross

    Danny Cross Bunny

    I think it eas a little early for a fight scene but the way you worked it out can keep the story going. I'd definitely like to read more about the characters though cause as of now we dont really know them.
    I'm not much a writer but I enjoyed reading the different styles of writing here. If i see somewhere i get an idea I might but i enjoy reading it.
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  8. Sajin

    Sajin User title under construction.

    They walked through the cave in complete silence for what seemed like and eternity, The troll had all but given up its hopes for escape and instead just accepted being bound by both Jax and Abel's entrapment whips. There were few sounds that broke this silence; the water dripping off the stalagmites and stalactites that were abundant inside the cave, the flapping of wings from the bats deeper in, and the breathing of the troll. "You guys haven't said a word to me since fighting this damned beast... whats wro..." his sentence was cut short as Abel had turned around and delivered a punch right to the side of his face, the pure impact of the hit knocked him against the wall and before he knew it Abel was already directly in his face. She lifted him up by his shirt collar and screamed, "You know that kind of magic is illegal! All transformations have been banned by the counsel, and for good reason too. Remember last time you tried that shit, you almost died!" Kain could see a tear in her eye, but it was clouded by the look of pure rage.. "Don't you have anything to say for yourself?!" she said as she loosened her grip on his shirt and he fell back to the floor. "Well?..." she said again. He looked at Abel and glanced over at Jax, who was obviously trying to hold back a laugh after seeing me take a sucker punch from Abel. "I didn't know what else to do.." Kain finally said. Apart from Kain's transformations he had very little power, sure he could pull the little parlor tricks; glowing hands, levitation, silly things like that, but nothing that could really pack a punch. Abel looked at him again, after a slight sigh a smile overtook her face. "But that's why were here!" she said as she winked at him "Jax and me are here , and we got the muscle! So when shit hits the fan, you just enjoy the show!"
  9. Ninva

    Ninva Retired

  10. KaerfNomekop

    KaerfNomekop Swim, fishies. Swim through the veil of steel.

    We can still treat this as the Exposition stage of the story. Having read till post #6, I developed this impression that Kain was a learning mage/hunter, and that Jax and Abel are his mentors. This is what I came up with then:

    [HR][/HR]
    "This big guy? A few hundred wnth at least," said Jax, "and maybe more, if we can stop ourselves from taking on the first bid that comes." She gave Kain a look laced with venom.

    "What? I already said I was sorry..."

    "Sorry doesn't cover the potential gains we could have made off that last one. But I guess it can't be helped. Let's go. We have a lot of ground to cover."

    [HR][/HR]
    Maybe it can still be integrated somehow. Depends on you guys.
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