What are your favorite quotes?

[Whitesock]

My favorite...

You know what a diet is don't you? IT'S DIE WITH A 'T' THAT'S WHAT IT IS!

 

[Aqua Dragon]

In Order to achieve great feats, you gotta do the most horrible and boring thign ever, practice

 

[BANANAMAN]

THIS IS NOT WARCRAFT IN SPACE!!! Its much more sophisticated!!-artanis Starcraft brood war

 

[Cheddar]

Practice makes perfect, but nobody's perfect so don't practice.

(On a bumper sticker) I've got a great body, but it's in the trunk and it's starting to smell.

Marge, if God didn't intend for us to eat in church he'd have made gluttony a sin.

-Homer, we're going to ask you a few simple yes or no questions. Do you understand?
-Yes. (lie dectector blows up)

-Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try.

-Fat Tony is a cancer on this fair city! He is the cancer and I am the ... uh ... what cures cancer?



Gotta love the Simpsons.

 

[Hero]

Here's one I made

"Life is not a nightmare, it's a dream"
-Hero

 

[Loading]

"It requires a very unusual mind to undertake the analysis of the obvious."
- Alfred North Whitehead

"No Pain, No Gain."
- no clue

"Talk sense to a fool and he calls you foolish."
- Euripides

"You choose to be happy."
- Anne Frank

"All men by nature desire knowledge."
- Aristotle

"There is more than one way to skin a cat."
- no clue

"Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results."
- Albert Einstein

"The great French Marshall Lyautey once asked his gardener to plant a tree. The gardener objected that the tree was slow growing and would not reach maturity for 100 years. The Marshall replied, 'In that case, there is no time to lose; plant it this afternoon!'"
- John F. Kennedy


"A good friendship is like pee in your pants, it's make you feel all warm inside"
- No Clue

"I shall not fear the unknown, the unknown shall fear I"
- Me

"There was a time when we expected nothing of our children but obedience, as opposed to the present, when we expect everything of them but obedience."
- Anatole Broyard

"You don't stop laughing because you grow old. You grow old because you stop laughing."
- Michael Pritchard

"To be alone is to be different, to be different is to be alone."
- Suzanne Gordon,

"I have discovered that all human evil comes from this, man's being unable to sit still in a room."
- Blaise Pascal

"Maybe because it's entirely an artist's eye, patience and skill that makes an image and not his tools."
- Ken Rockwell,

"Men live in a fantasy world. I know this because I am one, and I actually receive my mail there."
- Scott Adams

"The only true beauty is nature in its precivilized state."
- Me

"Last night I dreamed I ate a ten-pound marshmallow, and when I woke up the pillow was gone."
- Tommy Cooper

"You see things; and you say, 'Why?' But I dream things that never were; and I say, "Why not?""
- George Bernard Shaw

"What if nothing exists and we're all in somebody's dream? Or what's worse, what if only that fat guy in the third row exists?"
- Woody Allen

"Do not cry when some one you know dies; instead, rejoice in the fact that they have finally returned home."
- Me

A lot of these I found here​

 

[Wiseman_2]

Gotta love the Simpsons.

Never a truer word spoken.

"I know not with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones." - Albert Einstein.

"Aim high in life, but watch out for flying boxes" - can't remember.

"Cocaine is god's way of saying you have too much money" - can't remember

"Goverment is like gravity, it doesn't matter whether you believe in it or not, accept it" - Can't remember.

"Joe's Crematorium, you kill 'em, we grill 'em!" - The Simpsons.

"If something is hard to do, then it's not worth doing." - Homer Simpson

Navy Guy: "There's three ways the Navy recruits new people; liminal, subliminal, and superliminal."
Lisa: "What's superliminal?"
*Navy Guy opens his window*
Navy Guy: "HEY YOU! JOIN THE NAVY!"
Lenny: "Sure thing!" - The Simpsons

"I wish my grass was emo... then it would cut itself"

"I'd clap sarcastically, but it's not worth the effort" - Me.

"You, sir, are a moron!" - The Simpsons

"When you feel death tapping you on the shoulder, you gotta turn round, hit him in the face and run!" - obscure stuntman John Reid

Homer - "Son, one day you'll learn that not all of our problems can be flushed down the toilet"
Bart - "For the record, neither can grapefruit" (cue waterfall down stairs)
(The Simpsons)

Dr. Nick - "Hi, everybody!"
Crowd - "Hi, Dr. Nick!"
(The Simpsons)

Mr. Burns: "I give you the eigth wonder of the world - King Homer!"
Barney (in audience): "Wow! Look at the size of that platform!"

Ms Krabappel: "Bart, are you telling me that you read a book intended for pre-schoolers?"
Bart: "Well, most of it"

Bart + Lisa: "Dad! Dad! We did something really terrible!"
Homer: " Did you wreck the car?"
Bart + Lisa: "No."
Homer: "Did you raise the living dead?"
Bart + Lisa: "Yes, Yes!"
Homer: "But the car's okay?"

Bart: "Dad! You just shot Zombie Flanders!"
Homer: "He was a Zombie?"

"Please, if anyone has any information, dial '0' and ask for the police. That number again - '0'" - Chief Wiggum, The Simpsons.

"Brilliant, a time machine! I'm off to get me some caveman hookers" - Moe, The Simpsons.

"But how can you live like this? All you do is sit around and eat and sleep and eat and roll around in your own filth and sleep and - where do I sign up?"
- Homer Simpson, questioning the Manimals (part human, part animal) and realising his dream. (The Simpsons).

"But Einstein didn't learn to talk until he was three! And even then he could only speak German!" - Marge Simpson, The Simpsons.

Lisa: "But my IQ is only 159! Maggie's smarter than me?"
Simon Cowell: "Yes, because 167 is a bigger number than 159. You see how that works?"
- The Simpsons.

"If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life" - Unknown

"Man & his stupidity is the most solid proof that life originated from random crap by random chance" - Unknown

"If you think no-one cares about you, try skipping a couple of loan payments" - Unknown

"If Christmas is about giving and not receiving, then I cannot give for someone shall be receiving" - Unknown

And some random Simpsons quotes:

"Mayor Quimby supports revolving door prison systems. Mayor Quimby even let Sideshow Bob out of prison, a man twice convicted of attempted murder. Can you really vote for someone like this? Vote Sideshow Bob for mayor."

"You want the truth? You can't handle the truth! No truth handler, you! I derive your truth handling abilities!"

Tuesday:
Homer: "Well, it's been a long journey, but we're finally almost there"
Marge: "Homer, did you remember to lock the front door?"
Homer: "D'oh!"
Wednesday:
Homer: "Well, it's been two long trips but we've finally almost made it"
Marge: "Homer, when you locked the front door did you remember to lock the back door?"
Homer: "D'oh! D'oh!"
Thursday:
Lisa: "Oh! We left Grandpa back at the gas station!"
Long Pause.
Lisa: "What about Grandpa?"

"That's odd. The blood usually gets off at the second floor" - Mr. Burns.

Willie: "Boy! Ya read ma thoughts! You've got the 'Shinning'"
Bart: "Ohhh, you mean the 'Shining'"
Willie: "Shhhh! You wanna get sued?"


(Homer hacks his way into three different rooms with an axe and sticks his head through)

Homer: "Heerees Johnny!"
(Realises he is looking into an empty room)
Homer:"D'oh!"

Homer: "AyyyyyVanLollaman!"
Grandpa: "Hi David I'm Grandpa"
Homer: "D'oh!"

Homer: "I'm Mike Wallace! I'm Marty Shiefer! And i'm Ed Bradley! All this and Andy Roodey tonight on sixty minutes!"
Rest of family: "Aaaaarrrggh!!!"


Homer: "This shouldn't be too hard to fix, with the right tools" *Smacks toaster with rock*

Homer: "Wow! Look at that! I'm the first non-Brazilian person to travel backards through time!"

And lastly, everything the French guard on the castle says in Monty Python and the Holy Grail. Lol, that film has the biggest anti-climax I've ever seen.

 

[elmstfreddie]

In favor of the girls, I'd slightly alter it:
Vidi, vici, veni.

(Don't quote me on that one)

Too bad! Greatest quote on Earth as far as I know >_>

 

[Cheddar]

And That 70's Show has some good ones too:
-Wow, girls must really like astronauts 'cause it says here they get all the tang they want!

-You know what your problem is Red? I'm too good-looking.

Kitty Forman: Red's mother is coming.
Midge Pinciotti: What's that pet name she has for you?
Kitty Forman: Whore.

Donna Pinciotti: You have the van. We want to go home.
Michael Kelso: Na-ah! I can't leave Annette. I love her.
Eric: No, you don't.
Michael Kelso: I love parts of her.

Michael Kelso: I'm sorry. Look, I've been screwed by Darwinism... never needed to evolve listening skills 'cause my looks are so highly developed.
Donna Pinciotti: Um, that's not how evolution works.
Michael Kelso: Yeah, sure it is. Look, say I had to catch my own food, right? But I only ate really fast animals? My feet would eventually evolve into rockets.
Steven Hyde: Man, it's amazing your brain doesn't evolve into pudding.

Red Forman: What have I said about comparing your sister to the Devil?
Eric: That it's offensive to the Devil?

Michael Kelso: I'm not shallow. I just judge women on their looks.

Michael Kelso: Look, she's beautiful, she believes in me, and if I can get her to put out, it's 3 out of 3. Right now, it's 2 out of 3, and I'm sorry but 50% ain't gonna cut it.

Michael Kelso: What does he have that I don't? I mean, I have the three things women want: I'm hot and I'm smart.
Donna Pinciotti: That's two things you moron.
Michael Kelso: Nuh-uh, hot counts twice.

 

[BANANAMAN]

There is a fine line between insanity and Genius
I have removed that line-Unknown

A simpsons quote

3 words.....worst epsiode ever-comic book guy

 

[pheonixashes]

For those of you that played Kingdom Hearts II:

Hades: "I am the Lord of the Dead!"
Auron: "No wonder no one wants to die."

Riku: "What's so funny?"
Sora: "Your face!"
^Lol for a kid's RPG.
---

See personal title.
(Judge Bergan, FFXII)

---

Ratchet & Clank: Up Your Arsenal:

Skrunch: "Mk-mk-mk-kwak!"
Captain Qwark: "It was mating season! How could I have known she was your sister?"
"Err... how long have you two been standing there?"
Clank: "Too long."

---

My friends:

"Your mom's so fat, that when she jumped in the air, she was fat!"


---

And that's my favorites for now.

 

[ArmedCitizen]

"There are jobs Americans aren't doing. ... If you've got a chicken factory, a chicken-plucking factory, or whatever you call them, you know what I'm talking about." - George W. Bush.

"I'll be whatever I wanna do." - Fry.

"Comedy's a dead art form. Now tragedy, that's funny."

"Bite my shiny metal ass." - Bender.

"And my concern, David, is several." - George W. Bush.

(This are all funny quotes I don't like serious ones very much.)

 

[MeRcChRiS]

Cousin.

"I'm not to slow your just to fast"
and
"I'm not to fat your just to skinny"

 

[elmstfreddie]

I got this whole poster of stupid Bush sayings...
I could post them all here if you want me to.

 

[Duwenbasden]

The quote of the century:

Ni!

-The Knights who say Ni
---------------------------------------------------------

Somebody's gonna get a hurt real bad.

-Russell Peters.

And now for something completely different.

-Monty Python's Flying Circus

And am I expecting the answer "No"?

-John Cleese, Cheeseshop Sketch

Jolly Good!

-John Cleese, People falling out of tall building skit

yes, I use all of them in real life.

 

[BANANAMAN]

It takes any idiot to bring a knife to a gun fight.
It takes a special kind of idiot to bring a spork-Some forum sig

 

[mase]

"Pain is temporary, pride is forever." -My coaches

 

[U are a noob]

I can't find any program or application that allows FYI-ing models.

LOL OMG.......
________________________
Check Out my MUI System for GUI

 

[elmstfreddie]

Why use your own when you can use someone else's?

 

[Mmage]

Wait Wait, i got one!

If this is offensive to you, i am sorry, but it must be done!

I don't recall.

Alberto Gonzalles (might have mispelt)