Hoping to start a Novel [Need a Name]


Happy[ExtremelyOverCommercializ ed]HolidaysEveryon
I realize that I haven't yet given you guys an update to my story :eek:

How shameful of me!

Anyway he is a continuation from where I left off....

“Yes of course,” began Denerak in a nervous tone, “I am sure you have important things to do so I will tell you the message and be on my way.”
“Tell me the message?” Jurkai asked. “Is what you have for me not written of some sort of parchment?”
“Neh my lord, the message I have is too important. Instead I was given the message to remember, and believe me, that I am good with.” Denerak explained to the puzzled Jurkai. “I would explain this vast process of making sure we do not forget what is told to us, but I have wasted too much time already. The message I have for you comes from King Orlan himself.”
“The ruler of Akroya has a message for me?” Jurkai interrupted, “Now let me say that if this is another conscription request you had best leave now, I have already declined that 'order' given by your so called king.”
“No no, it is not a conscription order. It is an order, well more of a request, our mighty king would ask of you. I do not know every detail, as the king keeps most information to himself, but you are asked to have an audience with him in Hearth Glen, our capital, and most valued fortress.”
“Is that all?” Jurkai asked
“Yes my lord, there is no more to the message. Although, seeing as you have been kind I will tell you this, I am not the only messenger the king sent out.” Denerak began, “There were six of us, including me, who were sent out with this very message. I here to Exile, another to the Northern Injul Mountains, third to the High Spires in the West. Another was sent south to the city of Furja in Akroya itself. The fifth was sent South to the Dark Forest as we call it, but you would better know it as the Gantu Pines. And the final messenger, who I honestly hope returns alive was sent underground to the land of Hul.”
“One messanger to every region of our world...tell me Denerak, do you know if all of the beings summoned were leaders like me?” Jurkai asked him desperately. “Or am I the only leader being called to this meeting.?”
“As far as I know good lord, you are the only leader, although I cannot be completely sure. Unfortunately the only way for you to find out would be for you to yourself go to the meeting and see.” Denerak quickly responded, seeming to believe his answer would mean whether he lived or died.
“Very well, I shall go, but I will not go alone. i will take my three best men with me. Your Obsidian King has no objections to that does he?” Jurkai replied.
“He did not specify. Please, feel free to bring all your people with you if you want, I do not feel the need to stop you.” Denerak walked to the door of Jurkai's hut. “I must now be off,” he declared, “I need to send word to my King that you will attend this audience. The meeting date is set to be twenty days from today. I urge you to be on time, as I am sure you know King Orlan does not approve of tardiness.”
“Safe travels on your journey home, here let me give you some supplies to help you make it back.” Jurkai went to a seperate room of his hut and retrieved some bread, water and a knife for Denerak, and returned to the bedroom. “The bread and water will only last you so long, I suggest on your way back you find one of the Desert Boars to kill, just remember, the bigger the tusks, the more aggressive they are. And be on your guard for the [thinking of a name] Army. They are jackal-like creatures and will find no better joy than ripping a lonely city messenger like yourself to pieces.”
“I will run as fast as I can sir. And once again, thank you very much for your hospitality.” With that Denerak left Jurkai's hut and left the village into the wide, open desert.

“I hope I can make it back,” Denerak thought as he walked through the sand, “this place is really unnerving, not to mention the fact I feel like I am being watched.” Denerak continued his trek. It was true, Akroya was indeed a long ways away, although seeing as how he had originally made it to the village in the first place in under a day, Denerak had no doubt he could make it back in that same time, hopefully less. Now if only he could remember the route. Everywhere he looked was the same, or basically the same. Sand to his left, sand to his left, and to his front, and sadly...to his back. The only difference was a cactus or rock here and there. Letting out a sigh, Denerak took out his compass, 'Lets see,' he thought, ' there is a mountain range in front of the Akroyian outpost, then after that i headed west to the village, literally in a straight line.' Looking at his compass he swore aloud, he had been heading South. 'Oh well,' he thought, 'I will head East from here then go North when I hit the mountains, hopefully not literally.' Denerak looked into the distance, a small sand squall was beginning. 'Great,' he thought, 'just what I need...a sandstorm to make my walk through the desert that much more wonderful!'

The eyes stared at him in the distance. Unblinking, unwavering, ever watching. This was another one of those annoying humans like the ones in the Southern mines. How delicious they were, and hopefully this one will be just as so. The beast finally looked away from Denerak, and into the oncoming sand storm. 'This hunt will be quite easy,' it thought, 'oh well, I rather not waste all my energy before eating. Besides, I will need all my energy when me and the rest of my brothers devour all those delicious looking lion men. They looks strong, and nothing tastes better than well produced muscle.' The creature then burrowed itself beneath the sand, and headed towards it's prey.

Jurkai finally headed out of his hut into the village. It was small, yet also big enough for his people. If they were all running a muck, there would be no room between each person, but most people never stayed inside the walls between the two cliffs that their village lay in. It was funner to be out in the desert, in the wide open world, than it was in their small cramped village. Small little huts lay by the cliff edges all around the city. The people did not fear rock slides, for their homes where built strong, and they knew they would hold. In the far corner of the village lay their best, and only true source of water, a spring that seemed to be there as if put there for their survival. The spring's waters were the purest the Kan'goryan's had ever had, and many believed it could even heal the sick, or at least it seemed to at times. Jurkai set off toward the gate, when he met his toe best soldiers, and guards, Tarnakar and Mijun. “Greetings warriors,” Jurkai said to them in a friendly tone, “How goes the day? I hope the village is being protected well by you two.”
“Of course Lord Jurkai. You know very well we would slay any beast who dared threaten our people.” Tarnakar said in a sturdy, yet agitated voice voice. He was taller, if not as tall as Jurkai was, which to his people was an amazing feat. His eyes shone an emerald green and his fur say the most gorgeous of any other of the males in the village. However his personality did not match his appearance. If Jurkai did not run him to the bone, Tarnakar would be a wild thing, for he had a wild temper that was as wild as the long extinct Desert Drake. Anything and everything easily angered Tarnakar, yet Jurkai had swiftly changed that. Now he did his best to take some things calmly, even though he still did come into an emotion of rage now and again.
“We do our best to help our people leader” Mijun said directly, hoping to Jurkai wouldn't try and give Tarnakar a talking to about how he spoke to him. “We have had nothing come about today yet though.” Mijun was, sad to say, one of the weakest warriors in the village, still a powerful warrior, but not as strong as the rest. But what he lacked in his physical strength he made up more with his mental abilities. Where a normal Kan'goryan warrior would fling himself into battle, Mijun instead paced his enemy, observed it, took his time to find it's weak point, then struck at his enemy whenever he got the chance. Even thoguh he may have been weak in Kan'goryan eyes, he could slay more enemies than the most powerful on some occasions.
“I would ask nothing more men.” Jurkai spoke in a soft tone to his soldiers, what he was about to say, if not said properly, would most likely end in an uproar amongst his soldiers. “I had a messenger from Akroya come to me this morning and”
“Akorya!” Tarnakar bellowed, “Those bastards dare come to us again after almost completely destroying the peace we to our best to hold onto?”
“Silence Tarnakar!” Jurkai screamed, “It is nothing like that. The are not trying to disturb our peace, however the Obsidian King has summoned an audience with me in his Citadel.”
“You cannot go my lord!” Mijun spoke wit ha sound of fear in his voice, “It is most surely a trap, with you dead he would be able to take control of us!”
“I have no doubt considered that Mijun, which is why I am asking that you two accompany me to Akroya.” Jurkai looked them both steadily in the eyes. He needed his two best to come with him. He would find replacements for them for the time being, but in something this dire he could not spare to take an amateur.
Mijun and Tarnakar looked at their leader with awe. Surely they had not believed that they would ever be asked to be his body guards? It's not that they didn't like the idea, more or less, the fact that they found them selves unworthy of the task. In unison they both looked at him and in proud voices said, “It would be our honor Lord Jurkai. He shall let no harm befall you!”
Jurkai smiled, “I knew you men wouldn't let me down. Now come, we must be off. I know that they tax for entrance to the city so we shall head to the mines in the South and see if we can get any gold from the Akroyians down there. After all, we have helped them countless times have we not?” His men agreed. Then the horn sounded, and Jurkai looked into the horizon, 'Why now?' he thought.

Denerak found a small cave to settle himself in. 'I should be safe from the storm in here' he thought. Outside the sandstorm was raging wildly, sand and rock flying madly like bullets through the sky. Then he noticed it, a large shape neared the edge of the cave. “Hello?” Denerak said through the cave, “Jurkai is that you? I told you I will be fine to get back home on my own. I-” But Denerak stopped there, for what entered the cave was not Jurkai, in fact, it wasn't any creature he had ever seen in his life.On it's head sat six eyes, which starred at him like a hungry wolf did a hungry rabbit. To pincers protruded from below, looking to be as sharp as daggers, and a mouth full of razor sharp fangs behind them. It's hands were long, with dangerous and bloody looking claws, and it stood on six legs, with a deadly stinger at it's rear. “What the hell are you?” Denerak screamed. He immediately looked for his stuff, and unsheathed his sword.
“Thisssss will be better than I firsssst imaged” The creature said, “Devouring you will be mossst enjoyable.” The creature ran towards Denerak, readying it claws to rip through his flesh. Denerak did his best to defend himself, share blows between the creatures claws and his sword. He needed to survive, he didn't want to die. Denerak heard the creature scream, he had just cut off one of it's claws. “You will pay for that you basssstard.”


well its suggested that you write 3 pages a day...
but I write 5 usually mine but just don't go crazy trying to get it in... anyway

I read your snippet and I like it even though I think I have only read this or maybe another snippet of yours but GJ XD


Анна Ахматова
Ah, well now I have much more respect for you as a young writer. When I began writing it was only stuff that came to my mind. I still do this now a days.
Keep on writing, Demon. :)


Happy[ExtremelyOverCommercializ ed]HolidaysEveryon
Thanks for the nice words Ninva

The funny thing about my story is I already have all of it done.

In my head anyway, I still need to transfer it to paper. Every word, phrase, saying, event, etc. that happens in the story is already in my head, now I just need to write it out.


The Evolved Panda Commandant
Staff member
sick and disgusting (as my friend would say) tats a good thing... lol
nice story and very.. um.. profressional or wats the word... and you are in school so a young writer... pardon me bad grammer im too lazy right now... but anyways, good job. But wat exactly is the main character (i didnt see anything about tat i must be blind).
lol GJ its very. um... realistic lol :D:D:D

please also go to my stories I think the post is called:
DotA Story, Ninja Academy, and More! lol!

they are my stories...

so your story is done. Is tat the final what you have shown? If there is more, don't forget to post it in.
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