Shadowy Fear
I have returned
- Reaction score
- 44
I'm not dead after all, it seems.
Only members who have been here a while (2 years at least, I think) will remember me. For those who I didn't talk to much but were around at the same time, I was the naive young kid who was always throwing out random (and occasionally interesting or helpful) ideas to people [I was also very veribose and used lots of parentheses, as I remember]. A few people knew me better, though I usually kept walls up around myself.
For those friends whom I left without a word - I'm sorry I didn't say anything. I had intended to make some kind of farewell address or keep in contact, but - it's a long story.
My memory is fuzzy on the details. Essentially, I realized that Warcraft III (particularly the World Editor) was eating up my life. Several times I tried to control it, but I could never really escape its influence. I didn't have the experience or knowledge to break out of the cycle. I only had occasional flashes of clear-headedness that let me see the addiction I had fallen into, before unwillingly plunging into the dark fog again.
After several iterations of this, I finally realized the solution. So
I basically grew up during the interval while I was away, especially last year. I still play video games (every 6 months I feel like I'm too attached to some of them and purge them all from my computer) but they're much less a part of my life than they once were. I'm relatively happy (or at least content) with my life and my direction, and feel much more balanced as a person.
I've been thinking about rejoining the community since at least last spring. Inertia mostly kept me away. But I have 2 specific reasons for returning now:
~I have World of Warcraft now, and thus can actually relate with and help the site again, and;
~I miss the community and my old friends. I've also become a lot more mature than I was, and I feel like I never resolved this.
With [all of] that said, I wish to return. I'm still unsure about 80% of this, though, so let me know what you think/how you're doing/etc. With regards,
~Tim (formerly known as Shadowy Fear)
Only members who have been here a while (2 years at least, I think) will remember me. For those who I didn't talk to much but were around at the same time, I was the naive young kid who was always throwing out random (and occasionally interesting or helpful) ideas to people [I was also very veribose and used lots of parentheses, as I remember]. A few people knew me better, though I usually kept walls up around myself.
For those friends whom I left without a word - I'm sorry I didn't say anything. I had intended to make some kind of farewell address or keep in contact, but - it's a long story.
My memory is fuzzy on the details. Essentially, I realized that Warcraft III (particularly the World Editor) was eating up my life. Several times I tried to control it, but I could never really escape its influence. I didn't have the experience or knowledge to break out of the cycle. I only had occasional flashes of clear-headedness that let me see the addiction I had fallen into, before unwillingly plunging into the dark fog again.
After several iterations of this, I finally realized the solution. So
one day I snapped my Warcraft III game disk in half, threw away the pieces, and cut all ties to Warcraft. Those ties included this community - in fact, they revolved around this community. So I stopped posting, responding to messages, coming to the site at all, etc. (Again, my memory is unclear on this, so feel free to post your own memories or impressions) I think the process had already started before I snapped my disk, but afterwards it progressed very rapidly. Eventually I only checked in on the website every few months.- WARNING - You may wish to sit down for this -
I basically grew up during the interval while I was away, especially last year. I still play video games (every 6 months I feel like I'm too attached to some of them and purge them all from my computer) but they're much less a part of my life than they once were. I'm relatively happy (or at least content) with my life and my direction, and feel much more balanced as a person.
I've been thinking about rejoining the community since at least last spring. Inertia mostly kept me away. But I have 2 specific reasons for returning now:
~I have World of Warcraft now, and thus can actually relate with and help the site again, and;
~I miss the community and my old friends. I've also become a lot more mature than I was, and I feel like I never resolved this.
With [all of] that said, I wish to return. I'm still unsure about 80% of this, though, so let me know what you think/how you're doing/etc. With regards,
~Tim (formerly known as Shadowy Fear)