Life

[NotTheHelper]

Ok guys, I'm not having the best of days, and I got bored in physics and wrote this right quick. I'm not very good at poetry at all, but please tell me what you think and what can be done to make it better! ty all

Life

Life can be hard,
Sometimes you just got to go that extra yard.
You want to smile and have those good days,
But life can hold you back in so many ways.
It can be tough and unrelenting,
When that happens you just gotta look at that silver lining.
Just break free and smell that fresh air,
Life is so very short and unfair.
You only have one,
So live it up until your set and done.

 

[Ninva]

It was very nice. What you were missing was keeping a balance or pattern with syllables per line. I suggest you write a sonnet next. Sonnets are very exact, so the error possibilities are fewer. Also, your theme is slightly cliche. Try aiming for something different.

 

[Kainami]

I agree with Ninva wholeheartedly, but there's just one phase that you should avoid. Don't use dictionaries to find rhyming words. Simpler lines like these is what gives poetry its life and its flow.