Joke of the Day [Retired]

[Romek]

Bill​

A duck walks into a bar and orders a drink.

The Bartender says “That will be $2.50”

The duck replies, “Put it on my bill.”

I don't get that one...

 

[Darthfett]

Bill​

A duck walks into a bar and orders a drink.

The Bartender says “That will be $2.50”

The duck replies, “Put it on my bill.”

UGH! So old!

Running out of jokes, Pineapple?

 

[Pineapple]

I don't get that one...

The beak thing of a duck is called a bill.

UGH! So old!

Running out of jokes, Pineapple?

Nope, from now untill November 4th is Duck week. :thup:

 

[Jaujarahje]

oh god, duck jokes

 

[FireBladesX]

Nice,

 

[Pineapple]

Circus material​

A duck walks into a bar and said to the bar tender "I'll have a beer".

The bartender said "Hey! where did you come from?"

The duck said "I'm working the construction site across the street".

And the bartender said, "Well why are you working construction when you could be making millions in the circus?"

And the duck said "What would the circus want with a brick laying duck?"

 

[Pineapple]

Road Trip​

A man is driving a pick-up truck down the road with a bunch of ducks standing in the back. A police officer pulls over the driver, informs him that he is speeding and then asks him where he's going with all those ducks. The driver says that he doesn't know what to do with them anymore.

The officer says, "Look, there's a zoo not far from here and that's where you should take them." The man thanks the officer and drives off with his ducks.

The next day the officer again sees the same pick-up truck barreling down the road still with all the ducks in the back.

The officer pulls the driver over and says, "I thought I told you to take those ducks to the zoo!"

"I did," said the driver, "but now they want to go to the beach!"

 

[gameman]

Road Trip​

Spoiler

A man is driving a pick-up truck down the road with a bunch of ducks standing in the back. A police officer pulls over the driver, informs him that he is speeding and then asks him where he's going with all those ducks. The driver says that he doesn't know what to do with them anymore.

The officer says, "Look, there's a zoo not far from here and that's where you should take them." The man thanks the officer and drives off with his ducks.

The next day the officer again sees the same pick-up truck barreling down the road still with all the ducks in the back.

The officer pulls the driver over and says, "I thought I told you to take those ducks to the zoo!"

"I did," said the driver, "but now they want to go to the beach!"

Thats a really bad joke. (in a good way)

 

[Pineapple]

Thats a really bad joke. (in a good way)

yeah, I know where you come from. On the other hand, I have posted about 110 jokes.

But for me, the thought of a duck makes me laugh.

Is that wierd?

 

[gameman]

Is that wierd?

What ever tickles you funny bone is fine.

 

[Romek]

I PMed you a few Jokes, I guess you didn't think they where worthy of being in this sacred thread

 

[Prometheus]

he probably gets PMed a lot of em
he can only post 1 a day

 

[Pineapple]

Puddles​

Three ducks went into court. The judge called the first one to the stand.

"What is your name?" he asked.

"Quack." the duck answered.

"And why were you arrested?" the judge asked.

"I was stepping on puddles." he answered.

The judge didn't see anything wrong with that, so he dismissed the duck and called up the next one.

"What's your name?" he asked.

"Quack." the duck answered.

"Why were you arrested?" the Judge asked.

"I was stepping on puddles." the duck replied.

Again, the judge saw nothing offensive, so he called up the next duck.

"What's your name? No wait, let me guess, Quack." he said.

"No," said the duck, "My name is Puddles."

 

[duyen]

I PMed you a few Jokes, I guess you didn't think they where worthy of being in this sacred thread

I'm pretty sure he's doing duck jokes only this week.

 

[Pineapple]

Pinion​

Q: What's the difference between a duck with one wing and a duck with two wings?

A: A difference of a pinion

 

[FireBladesX]

Nice avatar <3
Nice knowledge of vocab, too.

 

[Pineapple]

Glued to you​

This guy walks into the doctor's office with this big white duck glued to his shoulder.

The doctor looks up and says, "Yes, sir, can I help you?"

And the duck says, "Yeah, can you get this guy off me?"

 

[Flying Hipo]

I like the jokes. Ive read em all, but, i just HAVE to ask. Whats with the new change and all the ducks?? by change i mean. all the jokes have ducks in em.

 

[Monsterous]

Its Duck Week of course!

Quack. Quack.

 

[Pineapple]

Quack​

Q. What is a ducks favourite food?
A. Quackers!

Q: What time does a duck wake up at?
A: At the quack of dawn!