World Apocalypse not right now: 'Rapture' end of world fails to materialise

Romek

Super Moderator
Reaction score
963
Inhabitants of New Zealand, scheduled to be among the first to meet the apocalypse according to a US fundamentalist preacher, this morning confirmed they were still in existence as the appointed time was reached in their time zone.

There were also unconfirmed reports that Tonga has, thus far, failed to boil into the Pacific.

Eighty-nine-year-old tele-evangelist Harold Camping had prophesied that the “Rapture” would begin with powerful earthquakes at 6pm in each of the world’s regions, after which the good would be beamed up to heaven.

This morning, Kiwis confirmed there were no signs of the dead rising from the grave, nor of the living ascending into the clouds to meet Jesus Christ.

Twitter users were disappointed by the absence of Armaggedon.


-------------

I sold my house yesterday thinking I wouldn't need it, and spent all the money on last minute partying. Any help guys? :(
 
Last edited by a moderator:

Monsterous

In the Shadows, Lurking.
Reaction score
99
There WASN'T an armageddon!?
Dammit, i took a loan from every bank and blew it all in one night. And i have a massive headache.
 

Narks

Vastly intelligent whale-like being from the stars
Reaction score
90
i wonder what would be going through the minds of people who honestly believed apocalypse would occur

i can imagine it would be very humorous
 

xPass

All aboard the xPass Express!
Reaction score
26
i wonder what would be going through the minds of people who honestly believed apocalypse would occur

i can imagine it would be very humorous

They'll be like,"WHERE THE HELL DID MY APOCALYPSE GO TO?"
 

Romek

Super Moderator
Reaction score
963
I heard there's a specific race of people who actually believe in the world ending every few years.
They're called 'idiots'.
 

Jesus4Lyf

Good Idea™
Reaction score
397
Courtesy reply.
Matthew 24:36 (AMP)
But of that [exact] day and hour no one knows, not even the angels of heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father.
Just read the verses either side of that where it repeats over and over how it will take everybody by surprise, and nobody will predict/expect it when it comes...
... and never think the Bible says the end of the world is on day x, anyone who says the bible even suggests a year is a fool.
 

UndeadDragon

Super Moderator
Reaction score
447
17:54 here in England now. No signs of the world splitting in half yet.

...Surprise surprise.
 

FireCat

Oh Shi.. Don't wake the tiger!
Reaction score
534
nobody will predict/expect it when it comes..
If there ever comes a day. hehe
Well, we cannot escape some climate change. that's another matter.
But the world and the universe will never end. Never has never will.
 

Accname

2D-Graphics enthusiast
Reaction score
1,462
its pretty easy to predict these things because nobody is able to prove you wrong.
 

duderock101

Check out my 2 Player Co-op RPG!
Reaction score
71
never heard of the elastic band theory. tut tut :p

Plus all it takes is for our scientists to screw up and poof they create a black hole in the ground which eats us for breakfast :(
 

celerisk

When Zerg floweth, life is good
Reaction score
62
> Twitter users were disappointed by the absence of Armaggedon

HA!
So, you haven't been rapetured? Well, I have some bad news for you, you weren't on the list. Simple as that.



Just in case you're still wondering where that... "prediction" is coming from, here's the fully logical explanation.
With clear facts like:
- since this Bible calendar is given by God in His Word, it can be trusted wholeheartedly
- the flood of Noah’s day occurred in the year 4990 BC. This date is completely accurate
- ...

Sounds so simple even you should get it.


But, of course, let's not forget the Real Deal:
Those who aren’t saved in the May 21 Rapture will be left behind after Doomsday ... for the final five months until ... October 21st..
If nothing else, you can buy the "I survived ..." T-shirt for a mere $20.40 :nuts:
 

Jedimindtrixxx

┻━┻ ︵ ¯\(ツ)/¯ ︵ ┻━┻
Reaction score
168
Just read the verses either side of that where it repeats over and over how it will take everybody by surprise, and nobody will predict/expect it when it comes...

So if we assign a day to every human being and keep assigning days where each person believes it will end on that day god will be forced to keep postponing it until people stop predicting? cuz if he deosnt then that 1 person predicted it.
trollscience/religion
 

Romek

Super Moderator
Reaction score
963
> Just in case you're still wondering where that... "prediction" is coming from, here's the fully logical explanation.
"7 BC—The year Jesus Christ was born (11,006 years from creation).
33 AD—The year Jesus Christ was crucified and the church age began (11,045 years from creation; 5023 calendar years from the flood)."
Is there something about BC/AD that I don't know? :confused:

Even so, nice find.
 
General chit-chat
Help Users
  • No one is chatting at the moment.

      The Helper Discord

      Staff online

      Members online

      Affiliates

      Hive Workshop NUON Dome World Editor Tutorials

      Network Sponsors

      Apex Steel Pipe - Buys and sells Steel Pipe.
      Top